Born To Die
by mustbemiskaten
Summary: She could see the future. He fought to protect his city. They came together in a crescendo of mixed emotion. It was going to end badly, and yet they found each other unable to break away.
1. Prologue

**Born to Die**

 **Written by:** Mustbemiskaten

 **Category:** Daredevil (with Avengers (pre-ultron) later on)

 **Genre:** Romance/Drama/Hurt

 **Timeline:** This floats around during season one of Daredevil, and is post Captain America: Winter Solider but Pre-Avengers Age of Ultron.

 **Rating:** R

 **Notes:** The idea of this would not leave me alone for days. This is based on/around an original character who I will try to develop as well as possible, but I feel like most originals she will have her Mary-Sue tendencies (ie: falling in love with a main character/having abilities). The story you are about to read is going to not only be long but it will be dark. I will pre-warn in the darker chapters, but anything and everything can happen in this fic. Sure there will be light-hearted moments, but there will also be moments of utter terror for the main character.

I write for myself, but I post for others-therefore the more reviews/feedback, the more I will post. I shall also mention here and now that I don't have a beta reader, I do all my own editing therefore some stuff may slide through the cracks.

And with that, enjoy.

/

 **Prologue:** I Need a Hero

" _You'll be okay, Lily."_

Her mother's dying words floated in her head as it was being smashed against a brick wall. The man who had dragged her into the dark, garbage filled alley was yelling at her to shut up-she wasn't aware she was making any noise. Was this how she was going to die? Some random attack?

He grabbed a fistful of her hair and started to drag her down to the pavement. Her body was reacting on it's own, her mouth screaming without her permission, her hands tearing at the man who was urging her to the wet concrete. Honestly she wasn't sure if she should be happy or not, sure this wouldn't be the ideal way to die (she was more than certain he wasn't going to let her live) but it would be better than being captured by those who were constantly chasing after her. They wouldn't kill her, the fate she had with them was much worse. Yet still, she fought.

It was a late summer evening, the sun had just set, and the world was still a sticky humid place. He was pulling at her shirt, cursing at her for wearing long sleeves. She doubted him yelling over her clothing choice was because he cared about fashion. It wasn't easy to get a girl who was bucking around like a dying fish out of a long sleeve shirt. It still tore, at the shoulder and down revealing the dingy well worn white bra that covered pale skin.

" _You'll be okay, Lily."_

It wasn't long until his hand reached against her skin after roughly pulling her bra down. The instant his flesh made contact with hers all thought washed out of her mind, replaced with visions of the future. It was painful, it hurt. It always hurt, even if what she saw was someone with a white picket fence and happy family life. This man did not have a happy family life for his future. Instead all she saw was a man in black, pulling him off of her.

While in the vision she must have been fighting even harder than she had been because a sudden stinging to her abdomen brought her mind back to the current, just in time for two things to happen-the first was to notice and feel a knife being pulled out of her stomach, the second was seeing her vision come true, a man in black pulling the creep off of her.

Her hand immediately went to her stomach, feeling a worrying amount of blood pouring out of her. She pressed down hard and bit back a scream. Was this really where she would die? Despite seeing what would happen to others in the future, she was never able to see her own future. The blood was warm, it was sticky, she breathed in deep. Her head moved, trying to track the two men fighting. It was a blur, or maybe her vision was getting blurry-she couldn't tell. The man who attacked her was not a very good fighter in comparison to the man in the mask, but he was putting up what little fight he did have. When they moved out of her line of vision she watched their reflection against the puddles in the alley, listening to the grunts, the sound of flesh hitting flesh.

Her stomach hurt. Anytime her lungs filled with air it pulled at her torso making it feel like there was a fire inside of her trying to get out. The warm sticky night was starting to feel cold, which she took as a bad sign. She wished that the man didn't rip her shirt. Her teeth chattered.

She didn't realize the fight was over until the man in black came into her line of vision. He was feeling her for injuries, his gloved hands making her feel at least a little relieved-no chance of him triggering a vision as his hands moved over her until they reached where hers were holding her stomach. He frowned.

"Help should be here soon, you were screaming pretty loud."

"No." Her weak reply. No. Help meant cops, it meant hospitals, it meant paper trail, it meant being found even if she was using fake names. They would find her.

"It's okay, you'll be taken care of." He said again, as if simply thinking she was too out of it to converse.

"They'll find me." She breathed out, her own gloved hands moving to cover his as he was already getting ready to pull away and run off into the darkness before the authorities showed up.

"Who?"

Was there any sense in lying? Was there any sense in actually trying to get him to help her? If she kept her hands off of her stomach long enough she would probably bleed to death, that was an option instead of keeping him there, trying to get him to 'save' her. Did she even want to continue on? Running day in and out? Looking over her shoulder?

"The people that created me." That summed it up. Didn't it? His mouth turned into a frown, he was trying to decide what to do, it was clear as day in the dark night of the alley that her words through a wrench in his plans. "If I go to a hospital they will find me, and it will be worse than dying here in this alley." Her voice felt soft, like she was whispering-she wasn't trying to, was that supposed to happen when you were stabbed?

The pain was also starting to fade, that also probably wasn't good.

She could hear sirens now. He was right, her screams had attracted attention.

After what felt like an eternity he picked her up off the concrete, and the pain flushed back into her body. "Thank you." Was all she had been able to get out before her mind went dark.

/

"She's lucky." Claire stated as she pulled off her latex gloves that were splattered in the girls blood. "If that wound was an inch to the left or just a little deeper she would have been in more trouble than she already was."

"Thank you."

"Any idea on who she is?"

"Just some random girl who begged me not to let her go to a hospital." Matt moved closer to the bed where the girl was now resting, her heartbeat moving at a normal pace now. He had brought her to his apartment, it was the closest place he could think to take the girl. Claire had been called as he ran home with the girl in his arms, the nurse thankfully was at the end of her shift and willing to help.

"Remind you of anyone?" Claire asked him as she took out a few things from her bag, "I'll leave some pain reliever for her, now that she's stable she should sleep through the night but she's going to wake up in pain. Extra gauze and tape, you know the drill-keep the wound clean for as long as she's here with you. I work a double tomorrow, but after that if you need me…"

"I'll call."

"I'm going to start charging you for this."

"And here I thought you liked the excitement I brought."

"Not hardly."

/

" _You'll be okay, Lily."_

It hurt. Her entire body hurt. The only good thing about that was hurt meant she was still alive. Hurt also meant she wasn't in a hospital. If she was numb to the pain, that would be a reason to be alarmed. Her eyes opened and took in her surroundings, she was in someone's bedroom. It was bleak, not decorated. The bed was comfortable and she would have enjoyed it more had her body not throbbed, she couldn't help but let out a moan of pain.

He appeared only seconds later, a glass of water in one hand and in the other a bottle of pills. She could tell by his jawline that he was the man who had saved her. He clearly didn't care about being masked now. She was also aware too much of her flesh was showing, her gloves were gone, she was in a tee shirt that was a few sizes too big.

"Here these are to help with the pain." He said, holding the pills out to her.

"I...I...um...could you set them down for me to grab?" She did not want to risk touching his flesh.

There was a pause but he did as she asked, setting the pills and water glass on the table that was next to the bed. As soon as he moved away from them she grabbed the pills and took them with a few large swallows of water. She hoped they would kick in soon.

"How are you feeling?"

"Like crap...but alive, so that is good." Her gaze on him was unwavering, it had been a long time since she interacted with someone that wasn't her mother (who was now dead) more than once.

"You're lucky I know a nurse, she came to patch you up for me."

The silence that hung in the air was like an elephant in the room.

"I should…" She started, but he was already talking.

"You said you were created." Straight and to the point.

"You run around in a mask and fight crime?" She countered back. He wasn't about to let the tables turn on him though.

"What do you mean? I don't make a habit of bringing people I save to my apartment."

She sighed, "Technically speaking I was created the old fashioned way, but science intervened...um, and let's just say those people that intervened like to think that they should have me under lock and key…" She bit the inside of her cheek, her hands in her lap felt cold without her gloves. "I don't think I should tell you more than that, and as soon as I can move more than a few inches I should probably leave."

"If you're in trouble I can help."

"Sadly, these people aren't the type to be stopped by a lone vigilante." She told him. She could feel the pain starting to ease, the pills were kicking in. It was like some weird stand-off, with her slowly starting to fade as the pain medication made her want to fall back to sleep.

"I'm Matt." He said after moments went by. She could only assume he introduced himself as a way to forge trust.

"Lily." She responded, "Thank you for not letting me die." Her voice was starting to fade as her eyes were having a hard time staying open. It was true, she really didn't want to die-but in the end death would in fact be preferable to what those after her would do.

"You're welcome. Go to sleep, we'll talk more later." Before she could stop him, his hand was on her forearm, helping her back down into the bed. Her breath caught in her throat, but no vision came.

She was too tired to say anything, too tired to think, too tired to agonize over the fact that she had never been touched flesh to flesh without it causing a painful vision.

 _Why didn't she see his future?_

 _/_

 _Soundtrack Notes:_

 _Lead Title: 'Born to Die' - Lana Del Rey_

 _Prologue Title: 'Holding Out For a Hero' - Frou Frou_


	2. Chapter 1

**Born To Die**

 **Written By:** Mustbemiskaten

 **Rating:** R

 **Notes:** None

/

 **Chapter One:** Maps

He wasn't sure what to think of the woman he rescued. She kept fading in and out of consciousness, her heart-rate would spike for a moment before she woke and typically they would have a short conversation as they waited for her pain medication to work. Everything he learned about her was fairly superficial, and he figured it would be that way until she could stay awake long enough to hold a real conversation. So far he learned that outside of her name being Lily and bad people being after her, she had only been in New York for the last week. She was staying in a motel on the edge of Hell's Kitchen and the night he rescued her she had been heading out to grab a bite to eat. Her favorite food was cake, which she did go on a pain medication induced tangent about how much she loved cake at one point.

He also learned she didn't like being touched, something he had to do in order to change her bandage. Despite her love for cake she was very skinny, his fingers brushed against her ribs as he removed the soiled bandage attached to her stab wound. "You shouldn't be able to do that." She mumbled, taking in a sharp breath as he cleaned up her stitches.

"Do what?"

"Touch me." Another shudder of a breath and her breathing evened as he moved to rebandage her wound. Her words were puzzle pieces to him, with each new statement making the whole picture clearer.

Matt truly had no idea what he should do. The girls heart rate never changed as she spoke, indicating everything she said was true-even if it was very sporadic. He lingered by her side after changing her bandage, listening to her breathing mix in with the rain pelting the windows. He had to drag himself away from the bed before he fell asleep next to her. He tiredly crawled onto his couch, his mind still swimming with more questions than answers.

He fell asleep with ease, he usually did since he tended to work himself into a state of pure exhaustion.

/

She woke up crying. More often than not Lily woke up crying. Most of the time she could never remember why, but would assume it was because she remembered some poor soul's fate. She buried her head into a pillow, forgetting for a moment she wasn't at her motel. The pain in her stomach was still there but no longer sharp. How long had she been in the man's apartment? She only remembered snippets of conversation here and there, but did remember how it felt to have him touch her. It was the first time someone was able to touch her skin without causing her a vision, the feeling was amazing.

There was no sunlight filtering in through the windows, it was hard to guess what time it was. That was the bad part about being in a city, there was always something going on. Sirens going, cars honking in the distance. She had been in a rural Georgia town before coming to New York, in that Georgia town at night you could only hear the crickets sing.

She pushed back the blankets, and noticed the few bruises on her legs from the fight. She was only draped in the man's tee shirt-which wore like a dress on her. Lily could remember there was a bathroom nearby, but never remembered actually getting up and going. She must have though since the bruises were faded enough to make her think some time had went by and she didn't remember ever waking up in a puddle.

When she stood up she cringed, her hand immediately going to her stomach. The pain was still there when she stood, eyes lingered on the bottle of pills Matt had left for her but she disregarded them for now. She was healed enough that being aware was more important than being in less pain. As she walked slowly towards the bathroom she paused at the bedroom door glancing out into the rest of the apartment. Lily could make out Matt's shape on the couch, sleeping.

His bathroom was as blank as the rest of the apartment, and all Lily could do was sigh-if she ever had her own apartment, the ability to stay in one place for longer than a few months? It would be decorated from floor to ceiling. The man either didn't care for furnishings or he was hardly home. Given he seemed to fight crime on the side she opted to believe his lack of decor was due to not being around much.

One look in the mirror let her know what she already did, her dark blonde hair was tangled and quite possibly caked in alleyway dirt. Her pale face had a fading bruise on her cheek, and her blue eyes were rimmed red from crying. She looked awful. She felt awful. It didn't take her long to decide to use his shower, after all he was sleeping-and honestly she needed to be clean. It took her a few moments to locate a towel, and then to turn the water on to an acceptable temperature. The shirt she wore was peeled off as if it was a second skin, she draped it over a railing. The hard part was peeling away the tape and gauze from her stab wound, she had to stop every few seconds. Due to Matt's constant cleaning the wound didn't look that bad, the stitches were neat, and it was only slightly puffy and red. The surrounding area was a softball sized shape of a bruise though.

"Meet the one person who can touch me without causing a vision and this is what he's been dealing with...lovely." She mumbled under her breath before moving into the shower.

Looking down she could see the dirt running off her body and down the drain, the hot water felt amazing on her aching body. Matt didn't have much in the way of shower products but he did have an all in one shampoo and a bar of soap that looked fairly new. Considering she had been laying in his bed for who knows how long she figured he wouldn't mind her using what he had in the shower. Not knowing how long the warm water would last she soaped up quickly.

After the soap was washed away from her body she just stood there under the warm water with her head bowed. She was trying to turn her thoughts off and just enjoy the warmth but that wasn't easy. She had paid in advance for a week in her motel while she hunted for an apartment so hopefully she hadn't been out of it for more than a week otherwise her stuff may be gone, she had planned to stay in the city for at least six months. Rule number one was never stay in the same place for longer than six months. She wanted a city after being in small towns for the last two years while her mother was dying of cancer. They had moved from hospital to hospital forging documents so they wouldn't be found. It was a hard time.

She wondered what she would tell Matt, quite honestly she wasn't one for friends but he saved her life in more ways than one-first keeping the creep who attacked her from doing more damage and secondly listening to her when she said no hospitals. Then there was the pesky notion that he could actually touch her without triggering a vision. She had never met anyone that could do that, even her mother couldn't touch her skin on skin without triggering a vision. It left her conflicted.

By the time the water started to turn cold she felt alive again. Clean. It was a good feeling. Stepping out of the shower and reaching for the towel she discovered a pile of clothes neatly stacked on the sink. Matt must have brought them in without her hearing him, she glanced back at the shower curtain thankful it wasn't see through. He also left her gauze and tape so she could finally take care of herself. It was nice.

She dried off fast and bandaged herself even faster, her fingers being careful as the area was still quite tender. The clothes he left for her again were a few sizes too large for her small frame, not only was she rail thin (a 'bean pole' her Mom would say) but she was also barely five foot. Instead of a tee shirt it was a button up, the sleeves were so long she had to roll them up just to get them to her wrists. The pants weren't much better, but they did have a drawstring so they stayed secure. She looked like she was playing dress up.

There was no comb to be located, so she did what she could with her fingers-brushing tangles out of her hair as best as possible. She just wanted to feel human again. Lily could hear Matt moving in the next room, she couldn't make out what he was doing, and honestly she wasn't sure how to approach their next conversation. She had no idea what she might have said when she was medicated, nor was she quite sure how this would pan out. Did she just awkwardly wave and say goodbye? Would they talk? Would he ask a lot of questions? Did she want to talk to him?

Honestly, she did. She was curious as to why he could touch her without triggering a vision, and honestly she was lonely. It had been her and her mother for so long, and then her mother was dead. For awhile her loneliness meant she was talking to herself quite a bit when she was alone which she was aware was starting to border on crazy territory.

"You can come out…" The voice drifted through the door, "Whenever you're ready…"

She frowned at that, it was as if he sensed her anxiety and wanted to assure her that everything was okay. Lily took one last glance at her reflection and moved towards the door, pausing only for a moment to feel her stomach ache-she didn't want to get drugged up again though, so she'd deal with it.

The first thing Lily noticed was that he had changed the sheets of the bed. She could see the old ones in the corner, her blood still staining them, she winced at that. The second thing she noticed was that Matt had brought in a bowl of soup and it was sitting on the bedside table. Her stomach growled...loudly.

"It's been three days, I thought you would be hungry. You only really woke up long enough here and there to drink water and eat a few crackers." He told her, gesturing to the soup.

"Thank you." She moved towards the bowl, and tried to remember eating crackers. She didn't.

"You're welcome, it's not cake but it's better than nothing." There was humor in his voice.

"Cake?"

"Yeah, you went on for awhile about how you really liked cake." He said, causing her to grimace.

"I literally have no memory of that, but I guess I do really like cake." She already started on the soup, it was warm, it was tomato, it was delicious. "So three days?"

"Just about, the meds kept you really out of it."

"I'm sorry, I've put you out."

"No, it's really no problem. I'm just happy you didn't bleed out in my apartment." Again, some humor, but there was a little bit of truth to that statement.

"Me too, I guess."

It was quiet for a minute, just the sound of her spoon hitting the bowl and the sounds of the city in the background. He seemed to be weighing his options in this situation as much as she was. Neither seemed to truly know what they should be doing.

"Lily, why shouldn't I be able to touch you?" Straight to the point. She took one last bite of her soup and thought about how to answer his question. The truth? He did deserve it, he saved her after all-yet the truth could also be a death sentence to him.

She had been good about covering her tracks on her own though. It was actually easier to be on the run by herself than it had been with her mother by her side. The likelihood of them finding her there before six months was slim as long as she was careful, so maybe telling him the truth wouldn't mean she was putting his life in danger.

"I'm...different." She started, honestly unsure how to explain things. He took a seat on the bed next to her, seeming to sense (yet again) that him looming over her as she sat made her nervous. "The reason you shouldn't be able to touch me is the result of an experiment done to me while I was still in my mother's womb." She bit the inside of her cheek, it was actually harder than she thought it would be to explain.

"It's okay." Matt said, reassuring her, and also reaching out with his hand to cover her own. She looked down, it was a weird feeling to feel someone else's flesh without it being attached to a painful vision. She couldn't help but to be curious, her hand moving not away from his-but to touch more of his hand, her fingers brushed against his rough knuckles, her skin feeling the warmth of his flesh against hers. It was nice. It made her heart beat just a little faster, it almost made her feel like she was a kid about to be caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

"I'm not sure what they did to my mother while she was pregnant with me. Part of me would love to find out how things were altered so much...but I don't know, it's kind of scary to think of what would have caused my...talent."

Matt was patient, and she mused it was both because he was curious and she was practically giving him a hand massage. She couldn't help it, who knew when she'd get the chance to touch someone like that again? He stayed quiet, letting her continue at her own pace.

"My mother kept a lot of it from me, both to protect me and whoever my Dad was as well. I guess one moment she was telling my Dad that she was pregnant, and the next she was being held captive by very bad men. She never told me who my Dad was, other than to say that the man who had taken her to those that experimented on her was someone who was close to my Dad. She said that the man had overheard them talking, and couldn't have my Dad's life ruined by some bastard child-but instead of paying her off or just outright killing her, the man took her to these bad people. I think a lot of it on her part was shame that it all happened, even on her death bed she didn't tell me who my Dad was. It's probably better that way though…" By now Lily was lost in her own musings, and Matt simply listened on.

"Some doctor or someone was feeling guilty one day and let her go. By then apparently she was nearly nine months pregnant and had been pumped full of so many chemicals that my mother seriously was worried I would be born with a tail or something. She ran and ended up giving birth to me in a very small Alaskan town." Lily paused for a moment to look up, away from Matt's hand to notice that dawn was breaking.

"Why Alaska?" Matt asked, pulling her attention away from the window and back to him.

"It was the first flight out of California that she could get on." At least that's what her mother told her. She sighed. "Obviously I was born without a tail, thankfully. I was normal, and I think my mother realized early on that I was a ticking time bomb."

Lily paused. If it wasn't for the throbbing starting in her stomach it would be the point in the conversation she would get up and pace while she tried to explain things. Instead she simply laced her fingers with his, and was thankful he was putting up with her hand holding. He seemed to understand how novel it all was for her.

"She figured out fairly early on that skin on skin contact was bad. Apparently I would scream non-stop if she had touched me with her bare hands, but anytime it was her just touching my clothes or something I was fine. It wasn't until I could talk that she figured out what was going on. I guess I had been running around where we were staying in Montana when some cop showed up to let us know about some break-ins around the area, he was friendly and I was in some shirt that got torn while I was playing. He had ended up clapping me on the shoulder after I said something cute apparently. My mother said that I screamed when he touched me, and seconds later told him he was going to die."

Lily couldn't remember that incident, yet she could picture the farm they lived on in Montana. Her mother had managed to get work there with horses, for exchange of some modest pay and a place to stay for the summer. She had loved Montana, it was perfect for a young girl who couldn't quite grasp why they kept moving place to place.

"You see the future?" Matt asked, and she nodded slowly.

"Basically when someone touches me or I touch them, I get a painful vision of their future. Doesn't matter if it's a nice future it still hurts. The longer I touch someone or they touch me the more I see." She slumped her shoulders slightly, "So, needless to say I've gone out of my way to avoid touching people...yet here I am able to touch you."

It was quiet for a moment, until finally he spoke again. "And the people that...caused this are after you now?"

"They caught up with us a few times over the years. The latest was how I found out my mother was going to die. We had been running for a few days, they caught up with us in Texas, and stayed on our trail for days. It was the closest call we ever had. By the time we were in a small town in Alabama I had to touch my mother to see if we would be caught or not. I didn't see us being caught, but instead I saw her dying of cancer."

"I'm sorry."

/

If it hadn't been such a serious moment and conversation, Matt would have been smiling. Lily was touching his hand similar to a child with a new toy and it was amusing...tragic that a grown woman was so captivated by the simple act of hand holding, but amusing nonetheless. Her explanation of things left him with more questions than answers.

"Do they know?"

"Do they know what?"

"The people that experimented on you while your mother was pregnant, do they know they caused you to see the future?"

"I honestly don't know. We don't know what they were truly trying to accomplish with me. Obviously they know something ended up working, otherwise I don't think they'd waste their time trying to hunt me down so badly."

"Do you know who these people are?"

"Hydra."

/

 _Soundtrack Notes:_

 _Chapter Title: 'Maps' - Maroon 5_

 _Background Noise: 'Titanium / Pavane' - Piano Guys_


	3. Chapter 2

**Born To Die**

 **Written By:** Mustbemiskaten

 **Rating:** R

 **Notes:** None

 **/**

 **Chapter Two:** Dream On

Morning was in full swing by the time she took another pain pill. Her stomach had been throbbing horribly and there was no avoiding it. At least she had a shower, food in her stomach, and knew she still had a few days left at her motel before her stuff was chucked out to the curb. After she had explained that Hydra was who had experimented on her and in turn was after her, their conversation ended up getting interrupted by Matt's phone going off. She blinked at his ring tone, it just saying 'Foggy' over and over again but didn't have time to ask anything as he said he would be back in a moment and slipped out of the room.

Lily was trying hard not to panic over the fact she just broke rule number two. Rule number one was don't stay anywhere for longer than six months, rule number two was don't tell anyone the secret. If it wasn't for the fact she could touch him, she probably would have crept out of his apartment while he slept. She knew it was selfish, the reason behind putting his life in danger was because she could touch him...but she never knew what it felt like to be touched without pain, and now she did. Selfish.

She willed the tears away, biting her tongue as she listened to the faint mumbles of Matt talking on the phone in the other room. She was starting to feel regret over telling him, she was also starting to feel the pain pill kicking in, and the urge to drift off to sleep rising to the surface.

Listening to his mumbling Lily took the moment to wonder about him. Honestly her life was so screwed up she didn't even think about who HE was. She only knew a few things, his name was Matt, apparently he wandered around the streets at night in a mask saving screaming girls, and his apartment was very very barren.

"Sorry about that." Matt said as he came back into the room, she blinked a few times trying to push the need to sleep away.

"It's okay."

He sat back down on the bed again, the mattress sinking under his weight. She looked down at her feet and how they were being swallowed by the legs of the pants she had on.

Things were quiet for a moment, neither of them speaking but somehow her hands found his again. He was like a beacon in the darkness for her. It was unsettling.

"Maybe it's because I'm blind that you can touch me." He said finally, causing her head to snap up so fast she was surprised that it didn't detach and fling itself across the room.

Blind? He was blind? How the hell was he blind? He fought off her attacker, he walked around like he could see, he moved towards her like he could see.

"You're blind? Like...for real? You...are you sure? I mean, no of course you're sure-just, you don't seem blind…" She wasn't sure if it was her shock causing her to stumble over her words or the fact that the pain medication was kicking in quite well and she wasn't sleeping yet.

"Let's just say...I'm special like you." She blinked at that and wondered if her life was just some big cosmic soap opera.

"I actually touched a blind person before, when my mother was first in the hospital for her cancer I ran smack dab into her, well actually the woman's cane tripped me and I ended up tackling her to the ground on accident and didn't have my gloves on."

"I take it you saw her future?"

"She was going to get married, it was nice. Still painful as heck, but nice nonetheless. She wasn't too pleased that I tackled her to the ground."

It was quiet again, and in that moment she couldn't help but wonder if it would have been better for her to have bled out in the alley. Her mind was swimming with thoughts and questions, for the first time in a long time she realized how tired she truly was of running.

"I was nine when I was blinded." He said suddenly, pulling her away from the thoughts she was having. "My Dad died not too long after that."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, I just wanted you to not feel like this was one sided."

This, what was this even? This was him trying to make her feel comfortable after spilling her guts to him. Yet when his hands found hers again she couldn't help but start to cry. Yes she was a little more comfortable the more she found out about him, but that was also the problem-she was finding out about him. It was conflicting. It was enough to make a girl want to run again, maybe instead of staying in New York she could go to a different big city and get lost.

"It's okay, you're okay." He assured her, trying to help calm her tears.

"It's not fair." She told him, squeezing her eyes shut and trying to will the tears away. "It's not fair that this doesn't hurt."

"What do you mean?"

"I've gone my entire life where touch meant pain and more than likely visions of horror, and now-I know what it feels like not to have it. It's like taunting a thirsty man with water. I get to know what this is like, what feeling someone is like and soon I'll go back to my motel and that will be that-because it has to be, it's not safe otherwise. It...just makes me wish for what I can't have." She tried to explain, it wasn't the most coherent explanation due to the meds making her brain start to swim.

They were silent for a moment, it was clear that Matt had no idea what to say to her. She was trying to decide if it would be viable to just pick up her stuff at the motel and run, but of course that selfish part of her was whispering ' _stay, it will be okay_ '. That stupid voice in her head was going to get her captured.

"How about you sleep for now? You look like you're ready to pass out. When you wake up we can figure things out."

"We?" She looked up at him curiously.

"I thought you would figure out I was a bit of a protector by now, I'll figure out a way to keep you safe-at least while you're in my city."

"It could get you killed."

He gave a shrug, moving to help her back into bed. She enjoyed feeling his fingers brush against her hands and arms. "Everything I do could get me killed. This won't be the first or the last time, let me help you."

"I'll stay, for a little while at least-until my stomach is back to working order and I can walk without needing to reach for medication. How does that sound?"

"Better than sending you off right now." He said with a sigh. Where she had an urge to run all the time, it seemed like Matt had an urge to help people-even if it meant he might be killed in the process.

"Thank you, you didn't have to do this...any of this."

"What can I say, I'm a good ole' Catholic boy." He gave her a smile, and she returned the gesture before shutting her eyes. She felt his fingers on her forehead brushing her hair back, and as Lily fell back into oblivion she could only reflect that this wasn't a good idea, but maybe it was time to have a bad idea for once and be a little selfish.

/

' _Curiosity killed the cat'_ was all Matt could think as he sat on his sofa. There were no current cases, so he didn't need to go into the office if he decided not to. Foggy had called to check up on him, which is something Foggy did often. He wasn't quite sure what to think of the girl and her story, by her heartrate he knew her to be true, but he also knew that she had been more than likely missing crucial pieces of the story. He assumed that if these people experimented on her, they probably knew what would happen, in turn showing that they wanted someone who could see the future to let them know what will happen to them. He imagined her being caught would mean she would be tossed in a room and forcibly touched over and over again so that men could hear their fate and avoid death.

That thought made him shudder. She was quite clear that it was painful to have visions, and the thought of her captured and alone being tortured in that way was enough to sound the alarm in his head to help her, even if he was still on Fisk's trail.

In his own fiery vision he could see that she was small, and wondered if her mother or anyone had ever tried to teach her to protect herself. Maybe he could teach her something, he knew her staying there even under his protection wouldn't last long. His time with her had a limit. He pictured a hourglass in his mind, remembering the look and feel of them, and thought that's what they were running up against. He would keep her safe while she was healing, and then more than likely she would run, and he would be back to working against Fisk.

There was also the curiosity of her not being able to have visions of his future. The way she reacted to his touches made him feel oddly good, every brush of her flesh against his lead to her heart speeding up, her breath catching in her throat-he would be lying if it didn't make him feel amazing to make her feel that way with only a casual touch.

It had been over an hour, he had been listening to the news on the radio to see if there was anything amiss in the city when her voice cried out for him. It wasn't loud, and if he didn't have better senses than most he might not have heard her call his name.

When he arrived at her bedside he realized she was sleeping, apparently calling out to him in her sleep-perhaps dreaming of how they first met, or maybe her mind was making up terrifying situations now that she had decided to let him keep her safe until she was all healed.

Instead of returning to the living room he sat on the bed next to her, keeping a watch over her in the same way he tended to watch over his city. She mumbled something that he couldn't quite make out, and gave a sigh in her sleep. He sighed as well, his mind trying to figure out how this was all going to play out.

/

When she woke up, she again had no idea what time it was. Light was still filtering into the bedroom, which was the only giveaway that it at least was the same day. The pain still throbbed in her midsection, but this time as she woke up she felt more rested. It also only took her a few moments to realize that there was a warm body next to her. Her entire body froze for a second before she realized it would have to be Matt, and therefore she could relax-his touch didn't hurt. She vaguely remembered having bad dreams, and wondered if she asked him to stay with her. Maybe he was simply there because he was tired of sleeping on the couch.

He rolled slightly in his sleep, moving against her as one of his arms wrapped around her torso and pulled her close against him. She again was reminded with that simple movement that this was all a bad idea. It was like playing some weird version of house where the house was on fire, but you were ignoring that problem and continuing on like everything was fine. She could hear her mother's voice in the back of her head, chastising her for wanting to stay with a near stranger for longer than she should. Hell, it didn't even matter that she was unique-even if she was normal this was a bad idea-Matt was a stranger. A stranger that liked to dress up and go fight crime in his spare time. It was a bad idea to stay next to him, to stay with him.

Yet she was still as he slept next to her, Lily wasn't running out of his apartment, she wasn't running at all. Selfish. She was being selfish. It was going to end badly, she knew it would. Even if she managed to stay in New York for a few months with no one finding her, she would have to leave at some point and it already was going to be hard to leave the only person who could touch her and he was still a stranger. In a few months when she knew him better? It would be even harder to leave.

Still, she shut her eyes and focused on keeping her breathing in time with his. Her life was hard, her mother was dead, Lily had been stabbed, and she spent most of her time on the run...if this was something she wanted to do knowing how stupid of an idea it was? She was going to do it and enjoy it. She found peace laying next to him just then. Not an 'everything would be okay' peace, but the kind of peace of mind you came across when you just said ' _fuck it_ '.

She was sleeping again in minutes.

/

Matt didn't intend to fall asleep next to her. He spent the last few days on the couch in a half awake state when he could, so it really was only a matter of time before he truly fell into deep sleep. One moment he was sitting up thinking about the crime in Hell's Kitchen, the next he was waking up. When he woke he realized that the sounds of the city were different, loud but not as loud-night time then. He also came to note that he was laying flat on his back and Lily was curled up against him, her head was on his chest, and his arm was instinctively wrapped around her small frame.

After being beaten so many times it was a nice feeling to have a warm body next to him. It also made him more aware of what he needed to be doing. He needed to be working to keep her safe while she was in the city, that was his promise. A plan was coming together in the back of his mind while he laid in bed next to her. As soon as she was awake he would order some food, and then he would head to her motel to pick up whatever stuff she had there. Then what? Well, he was just making it up as he went along.

Honestly he would like to understand why she couldn't see his future when everyone else's was crystal clear to her. Apparently it wasn't because he was blind. What else could it be? The thought ebbed at him as he listened to the sounds of the city. He was so caught up in his private musing about what could cause his future to be dim to her that he didn't notice she was stirring until her head lifted up off his chest.

"Hi."

"Hello."

"This is a bad idea."

"I know." Truly he did, he already had enough going on trying to start up a law firm with Foggy and trying to figure out how to get Fisk out of Hell's Kitchen. Now he had all that _and_ a woman he saved off the street who had a unique talent, people after her, and a knife wound to the gut.

 _But what would his father say if he didn't try to help her?_

They were quiet for awhile, she laid her head back down on his chest but he could tell by her breathing that she was still awake. Both of them simply listening to the sounds of the city and reflecting what poor decision making abilities they had.

"You know…" She started, drawing him out of his thoughts, "If you hadn't mentioned it I really don't think I would have known you were blind."

He was silent, unsure what to say to that.

"Why do you do what you do?"

"Because I can." He said quite honestly. He might be blind, but he was able to help his city, able to protect her from a thug off the street.

"I wish I could help people like you."

"Why don't you? Use your gift to let people know what will happen?"

"That kind of thing draws attention, those after me would use me for...well I think we can both assume it wouldn't be good since they aren't the...good type. People don't believe me anyway, I have tried before to warn people...Cassandra's curse I guess."

"Cassandra?"

"She was able to see the future, but when she wouldn't 'seal the deal' so to speak with Apollo she was cursed so that no one would believe her."

His hand found hers, and he listened to her heart speed up a little more. Matt was fairly certain he had never been around anyone who enjoyed the simple act of hand holding as much as she did. "That's a bad curse."

"So is being blind."

"Guess we're both cursed in different ways then." He said, listening to the steady drum of her heart mix in with the sounds of the city.

"How did it happen? You said you were nine, were you sick?" She asked, curiosity lingered in her voice.

"Chemicals. There was a man and he was going to get hit by a truck, I reacted and pushed him out of the way, but in doing so the chemicals that were being transported on a truck splashed into my eyes."

"So you were saving people even before you were blinded."

"I suppose I was."

There was a silence between them once more, she started playing with his fingers again. Her hands were cold and soft. He wondered what it was like not to be able to truly touch someone without pain, "What does it feel like?" He murmured finally, causing her hands to go still on his.

"Touching you with no pain, or having the visions?"

"Both."

"Touching you is intoxicating, the pain I feel with the visions is...shocking. If it's a short touch it's not as bad, almost like accidentally touching an electric fence-it starts in my head and the shock works itself through my body as the vision starts. If the touch is longer, be it by accident or force its...much worse." She took in a breath, and as she did so Matt could tell that her stomach was starting to bother her again, the way she pulled the air back into her lungs, the slight shift of her body against him, yet she continued on, "There was this day when my mother and I were in Oregon, I had just turned thirteen. We were in a grocery store but I went to grab something from a different aisle when some store worker came over to me, she thought I was shoplifting or something...her hand reached out and grabbed mine getting ready to pull me to the manager's office or something...it hurt so bad. It wasn't like the small shocks of accidental touches, it was like a searing fiery pain as her life was flashing before my eyes."

She took a raspy breath, he could feel his shirt getting damp, tears. She was crying.

"The woman had only been touching me for a minute or so, but it was enough to see a good long look into her mundane future, long enough for me to be screaming the entire time. My Mom grabbed me away from her and we ran. I was really out of it for a few days, the pain lingered in my head, and my voice was so raspy from screaming. I think my mother and I both understood then, the pain that would wait for me if Hydra found me."

His free hand, the one that had been holding her close went to her hair as she spilled tears onto his chest. Matt chewed on his bottom lip, suddenly feeling very guilty that while he would try to protect her while she healed up-the chance of him keeping her safe as she was being chased down by Hydra would be slim. "I'm so tired of running Matt, but I know if I stop for too long...and they find me…" The statement hung in the air.

He did the only thing he could think of, he held her closer-letting his hands linger on any exposed flesh they could find. Matt couldn't protect her forever, but he could at least give her physical contact that was pain free.

"Well in this moment you do not have to run. For the rest of the night let's just pretend."

She lifted her head up off his chest, "Well if we're going to be having a night of no worries, let's get some food...I'm starving."

He laughed at that, and joined in-everything was so absurd why not have a little carefree moment while they could...while they both could?

/

 _Soundtrack Notes:_

 _Chapter Title: 'Dream On' - Depeche Mode_

 _Background Noise: 'Fade Into You' - Mazzy Star_

 **Story Q &A:**

 _So why can't Lily see Matt's future?_

We'll find out in a few chapters. There is an actual reason.

 _Why are they already so close?_

They're both in moments of emotional weakness, Matt is in the middle of hunting for Fisk, and Lily finds she can actually touch him. Some relationships just start fast and hard.

 _So, Hydra?_

Yup. They're the boogeyman that looms in her deepest fears.

 _How exactly do her powers work and why?_

That will be answered in time. It's not something to be explained now because even SHE doesn't know.

 _Who is her Dad?_

That's for me to know, and you to speculate about!


End file.
